IN THE GREEN CORNER …
In a 2021 study, 1,700 people were asked which animal they could beat in an unarmed fight. The results were alarming, with 9% of men believing they could conquer both an elephant (who regularly uproot trees to eat their leaves) and a gorilla (who have, on average, about six times more upper-body strength than the average human). Football Daily is not in the business (or any business, come to think of it) on how many men out of 100 would actually survive an unarmed scrap against an elephant or a gorilla, but this tea-timely email has been pondering if it really would be nine. But whether you’re signing up for a fight-to-the-death tussle against a wild animal or casually attempting to boot a stray football (first time) back over the playground wall in front of your partner, their parents and a small crowd of expectant teenagers, what people think they can do versus what they can actually do doesn’t always match up. Confidence is essential in elite sport, we’re told, but – just like those four pint glasses Football Daily dropped on the pub floor after refusing the offer of a tray – it also remains an incredibly fragile and dangerous commodity.
All of which is, of course, an incredibly laborious way of setting up Plymouth Argyle’s FA Cup trip to Manchester City on Saturday. How must those plucky Pilgrims be feeling, given their recent history of knocking out Premier League Brentford in the third round and their giant-killing of champions-elect Liverpool in the fourth round? Perhaps very confident of repeating the trick! Hurray for the Magic of the Cup! Hurray for Plymouth! Or, given that City seem to have finally got their act together, are playing Argyle in the final competition in which they can actually win any silverware this season, still have around a billion pounds’ worth of elite talent and arguably the greatest manager ever … perhaps not very confident.
Conor Hazard, Plymouth goalkeeper and presumably one of those nine men in the YouGov poll who ticked ‘Yep!’, certainly believes his side can cause an upset at City. “There’s every chance a game like this could go to penalties – we’ll definitely do some preparation on that,” he cheered. “We’ve got 8,000 people going up there to support us so we don’t want to let anyone down. We did such a good job against Liverpool and hopefully we can do the same at the Etihad. We’re all really up for it. We know the task ahead and what we need to do to try and get a result there. That’s our aim.” You simply cannot argue, we’re told, with that sort of confidence. Gloomy bookmakers, at the time of publishing, are giving the Devon club around a 3% chance of victory in Manchester. And while that sounds low, remember that 7% of (unarmed) men in that poll thought they could beat a grizzly bear and 10% thought they could get the better of a crocodile. So, you know, there is that.
LIVE ON BIG WEBSITE
Join Simon Burnton at 8pm GMT for updates on Aston Villa 0-0 Cardiff (aet; 1-0 on penalties) in the FA Cup fifth round.
QUOTE OF THE DAY
Premier League content is so valuable because it’s so widely demanded. How many global platforms are there? Probably just Netflix. If you’re thinking about how do I launch a global product, you do it in partnership with content like this” – Todd Boehly overlooks the huge global reach of yours truly while also failing to acknowledge that it’s no longer 1992 – and the Premier League is doing all right, Jack.
FOOTBALL DAILY LETTERS
With regard to the nomenclature bandwagon (Football Daily letters passim), can I suggest that Old Trafford henceforth be known as the Theatre of Memes?” – Callum Taylor.
Since Football Daily/Weekly are obsessed with the phrase ‘Farmers’ League’, I suggest having a look at the table of the Swiss Super League, where the top eight teams are within six points and the top four are tied with only goal difference separating them. That’s what a true Farmers’ League looks like. Also, the standout player of the season so far has been the former Liverpool and Stoke winger Xherdan Shaqiri with eight goals and 11 assists. I thought you might find this amusing” – Florian Schönmann.
Can I ask why Jess Park has a smart phone in her hand (photo in yesterday’s News, Bits and Bobs, full email edition? Does she not believe in VAR confirming her goal?” – Michael Dawson.
Send letters to [email protected]. Today’s letter o’ the day winner is … Callum Taylor, who gets some Football Weekly merch. We’ll be in touch. Terms and conditions for our competitions can be viewed here.
ROAD TO WEMBLEY
No, we don’t go south of the river at this time of the morning. Yes, Football Daily’s FA Cup odyssey takes us to a Sarf Lahn derby, and Saturday’s 12.15pm kick-off between Crystal Palace and Millwall. For various reasons, the Met police have decided that’s the best time for proceedings to start. Millwall, or Eeeeaaaaawaaagggghhhhlllll, as some fans prefer to pronounce themselves, are under the management of Alex Neil, who has been helming the Lions since replacing former hero Neil Harris, who quit after labelling some of their fans “thickos” . “The pressure is more on Palace than on us,” roared the Scot. Oliver Glasner is eyeing an Eagles cup run now that safety is all but secured, perhaps looking to emulate Alan Pardew’s legendary dance moves should a Wembley final be reached. Given their recent good form, we fear our Millwall allegiance may be short-lived.
NEWS, BITS AND BOBS
José Mourinho has been banned for four matches and fined £35,194 for “derogatory and offensive statements” against a Turkish referee – and the Turkish game – after Fenerbahce’s fiery derby with Galatasaray on Monday. Meanwhile, Fenerbahce have launched a legal case against Galatasaray for accusing their manager of making “racist statements”.
Ruud van Nistelrooy reckons his meek Leicester players invited West Ham to scoop up three easy points. “When you are passive and hope the opponent doesn’t score, you call it upon yourself,” he sighed after the 2-0 away defeat. “The easy goals we conceded are a part of it.”
Crystal Palace have sacked head coach Laura Kaminski with the team bottom of the WSL.
Liverpool shed £57m fat ones last season after missing out on Bigger Cup while wages and costs increased, their latest accounts have revealed. We’ve a feeling beancounters may be feeling a bit happier this time next season, mind.
Manchester United and Fulham fans will join forces to protest against Big Sir Jim Ratcliffe’s ticket pricing before Sunday’s FA Cup fifth-round clash, where away prices are between £52 and £61 for fans this weekend.
Meanwhile, Alejandro Garnacho will buy dinner for his Manchester United teammates to make up for his bad reaction to being substituted against Ipswich. It probably won’t be from the staff canteen, though.
And trials allowing goalkeepers to hold the ball for eight seconds instead of six are progressing positively towards a law change in the future, according to Ifab, despite the fact that no referee appears to have given a flying one about this rule for the best part of three decades.
STILL WANT MORE?
Ed Aarons investigates the Arsenal production line for the next generation beyond Ethan Nwaneri and Myles Lewis-Skelly before the night’s FA Youth Cup tie with Manchester United.
Aston Villa forward Kirsty Hanson is campaigning to help fight dementia. “It affects so many people,” she tells Suzanne Wrack.
The things to look out for in the Premier League FA Cup this weekend.
And Tom Finney and Bob Lord, Preston and Burnley: John Brewin heads down a Lancastrian time tunnel before a hotpot of a fifth-round tie.
MEMORY LANE
Liverpool’s Phil Neal and Everton’s Andy Gray visit the set of Brookside in March 1984, where the players met Paul Usher (who played Barry Grant) and Simon O’Brien (Damon Grant). The visit came before the League Cup final between the two clubs, a 0-0 draw at Wembley, with Liverpool winning 1-0 at Maine Road in the replay.
